Sunday 22 May 2011

Social Skills I am Trying to Put into Practice

I think the reason why I haven't posted anything here for a month is because I've been too busy socialising and haven't had the time to analyse every occasion and report on it! Over the past month or so I have been to several good organised socials and other social events where I have had the opportunities to interact with some attrative women.

Now having read a number of articles online and an e-book about how to build attraction with women and demonstrate those so-called 'alpha-male' characteristics that attract women, I have been wanting to put those principles into practice. Now I don't go and do exactly what a book says, but I like to take the key principles it advocates and apply them in such a way that suits both the type of social occassion and my personality. What I often find is that whilst I may know some of the theory, I cannot put it into practice on the spot.

One thing I am trying to do is to comment on things such as the woman's clothes, or style or bag, or any other observations. Friendly, kind comment obviously, and nothing suggestive of course. Another thing I am trying to do is to make statements about myself and what I have been doing that will help them to view me as one with high social status (I've mentioned the car journey in my last post a few times) and arouse some curisity, by telling them only part of a story and leaving them wanting to know more. One thing I have learnt is that, just as in job interviews where one can put a spin on their previous work experience making it out to be a higher level than it really is i.e. by refering to something significant they did in the previous job, making it appear as if they did that regularly when in reality they only did it once, one can put a spin on their social life highlighting those few occassions that would make me appear to be off high social status, when in reality such occassions aer few and far between.

However, I still find myself dealing with awkward silences. One thing I often notice when in a conversation with two or more people who I don't know particularly well, is that the other two people end up doing most of the conversation and subtly I become the one on the sidelines. I'm the one trying to keep up.

Before social events, I often 'revise' first on my notes from things I have read about socialising and attracting women. Bear in mind that at events life organised socials, I'm not there to 'pull' and no-one else is supposed to be, but nonetheless I do want to display those traits that are attractive to women and show myself to be a confident, datable, male. However after 'revising' I often find my stumbling block is operating within the context of the conversations I find myself in or developing. That the reason why I often find public speaking easier than mingling - when speaking in front of a group I have full control over the context. Problems arise when the context is based around something you don' know much about - and that could be a countless number of things. I'm thinking the best way to deal with that is to observe how people who are strong socially deal with such a situation, and follow their example.

Needless to say, I am still practicing, and trying to gain experience in some way every weekend, if not during the week as well

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