In recent years one of my main social activities has been latin dancing, salsa and bachata. This has brought huge value in my life, especially as it enables me to get physical close to many hot, attractive women. As far as I'm can see this is the only way to get close physical and sometimes sensual contact with women without going through all the hoops needed to form a relationship.
While you get some people, though not many, attending dance events as a couple, in terms of dancing, hardly anyone will ever go to one of these dance events and only want to dance with one partner. You're free to dance with any woman, and women come to dance with a wide range of men. A dance is nothing more than a dance. When the song ends you find another partner. No one is seeking to 'settle down' with one exclusive dance partner. If they're a regular, chances are you'll dance with them again either later that night or at another event. Other people you may only ever dance with once.
It occurred to me that if dating and sex was a dance event, that is was abnormal to be exclusive, and that all men and women (except those not interested at all) were open for dating and sexual activity with multiple partners, with no intention of finding an exclusive partner, life would be better, and it would remove this frustration. There could be a local dating community forum, you could say you're looking for someone to go down the pub on Wednesday, or your date at some social function, or you want a sexual encounter, and you find someone who at least likes you enough, and is available that night. Hopefully you'd get to know many people socially this way, just like you familiarise yourself with certain dance partners.
I'm starting to think that when I say I want a girlfriend, what I really mean is that I don't like seeing girls to find a boyfriend they are exclusive with and become unavailable and socially more detached from everyone else other than the boyfriend, at least not unless I also can find an exclusive girlfriend.
At a dance event, it is very inclusive. You don't have to be the best or more sought after dancer to find people to dance with you. Most women will be open to dancing with a wide range of men. Of course it's hard if you're a beginner, however you'll probably find more advanced dancers willing to help you.
Whereas with dating, sex and relationships, a large number of guys who are not the most attractive (in the broader sense) will get left out in the cold in a climate of exclusivity. Its very ironic that it can be hard to meet another 30 or 40 year old woman who we have much in common with for coffee, if she has some other boyfriend, because I might be seen as a threat, yet I could visit any 80 year old who I may have nothing in common with and there would be no issue! Whereas if we did away with our exclusive dating climate, one could meet up with anyone with no issues of temptation or jealousy!
What I'm basically saying is that the only real reason I feel dissatisfied being single is because of the culture of exclusivity. I wish it wasn't that way, or else could find a significant local community of normal, attractive heterosexual people including many women who purposefully reject exclusive relationships and are as open to dating multiple men as and when in the same way as if you go to a dance event. And you can make general platonic friends with such people knowing that there won't be some new romantic boyfriend getting in the way.
These are just my thoughts at the present time, which are developing always. I'm not trying to propose anything, just thinking through my underlying thoughts and feelings. Sometime you say you want one thing, but when you think hard enough and ash why, you realise what you actually want is not quite what you were thinking.
So admittedly much of my own motivation for finding an exclusive girlfriend is so that I don't get left out in the cold, tossed around by the social tide, and lack what girls with exclusive boyfriends have.
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